Let’s be real, for something as meaningful as saying “I do,” the wedding ceremony often gets the least love in the wedding planning process. When it comes to planning a wedding, Couples obsess over the food, the dress, the decor, the dance floor, the table plan…

But here’s something I see far too often, when it comes to the ceremony, the actual moment they become married or united? It gets treated like the bit you have to get through before the real celebration begins. It’s all too easy to let a stranger sent from the council handle it and hope for the best. Because of that, couples end up with a ceremony that feels flat, awkward or like it could have been anyone’s.

But here’s the thing: the ceremony is the moment. It’s why you’ve gathered your people together. And if you don’t give it the same attention you give the rest of your day, it can end up feeling underwhelming and easily forgettable.

In this blog, I’ll walk you through the biggest mistakes I see couples make with their wedding ceremony, what happens when couples fall into them, and how you can avoid each one so you can start your celebration with a moment that’s unforgettable, personal, and undeniably you.

Mistake #1: Leaving It Too Late

“We’ll just figure out the ceremony closer to the time” This one? Oof. A classic.

When everything else feels more urgent, like venues and caterers and guest lists, the wedding ceremony gets pushed down the to-do list.

Outcome: Waiting too long often means you’re left with limited options, a rushed process and a ceremony that feels generic rather than deeply personal and moving. Or worse, someone you barely know who doesn’t get you, reading from a script you didn’t choose and the most meaningful moment of your day ends up missing the mark.

How to avoid it: Prioritise the ceremony early. Book your celebrant right after you’ve booked the venue and before you’re deep in cake samples to give yourselves time to reflect, dream, and co-create something meaningful and totally “you.” A great ceremony takes time to craft and it’s so worth it.

Mistake #2: Treating It Like a Formality

“We just need someone to say a few words and make it official.” Nope. Not if you want your guests to feel something. When you treat the wedding ceremony like a box to tick, that’s exactly how it’ll feel.

Outcome: You breeze past the part where you actually get married. Your guests aren’t moved, you’re not really present, and the ceremony becomes a box-tick instead of a memorable and meaningful moment. The most important part of your day feels rushed, forgettable, and disconnected from the celebration you’ve worked so hard to plan.

How to avoid it: Reframe the wedding ceremony as the heart of the day and think of it as the main event. Give it the care it deserves. Put love, laughter and storytelling front and centre - it’s not just words, it’s the moment that sets the tone for the day and kicks off the celebrations. Think about how you want to feel in that space, and what you want your guests to remember. Make it personal, engaging and surprising, that’s how you start your wedding day off with a bang! Your guests will thank you and be talking about it for years to come.

Mistake #3: Using a Script That Doesn’t Sound Like You

Some wedding ceremonies sound like they were written in the 1800s. Formal, stuffy, and not even a tiny bit reflective of the couple standing at the front.

Outcome: You’re standing in front of your favourite people and none of the words feel right. They’re too formal, too fluffy, or just completely unrelated to your relationship. It’s awkward. It’s forgettable. The words don’t reflect your relationship, so the moment falls flat, with lots of sombre faces and yawns rippling across the guests. Lots of watch checking too…

How to avoid it: Personalisation is everything! Choose a celebrant who takes time to get to know you and who gets you and your vision. One who listens, asks good questions, and writes your ceremony from scratch, in your voice, with your humour and your story. When it feels real, everyone feels and remembers it.

Mistake #4: Forgetting the Guest Experience

Yes, it’s your wedding ceremony. But your guests are part of it too and their energy is what the entire thing feeds off, whether they are engaged or passively watching can make or break your magical moment. Long-winded readings, awkward silences, or inside jokes they don’t get can make them feel disconnected and create a flat feeling.

Outcome: People are fidgeting, zoning out, or checking their phones instead of being present with you and you miss the chance to create a shared experience that brings everyone in. That’s so not the vibe you want before the confetti flies.

How to avoid it: A great ceremony isn’t just about you; it’s for your guests too. The people you love most are there, so let’s give them something to connect with. That might be laughter, storytelling, interactive elements or rituals that involve them. Keep it snappy, warm and engaging. When guests feel included, the whole atmosphere changes. A great wedding celebrant will encourage you to think about pacing, energy and moments that bring people in.

Mistake #5: Following Traditions You Don’t Even Like

Just because your cousin did a sand ceremony doesn’t mean you have to. If it doesn’t feel right, skip it.

Outcome: You end up doing things you don’t care about, just because it’s “what people do.” And instead of feeling joy or connection, you feel a bit disconnected or awkward and uncomfortable. Because it doesn’t feel like you, it drags on and you’re mind is wandering to what comes after instead of being truly present with your partner.

How to avoid it: If something doesn’t resonate, you don’t need to include it. The best ceremonies start with intention, not tradition. Start with what feels like you. Want a singalong? A shot ritual? A surprise entrance? Do it. There are no rules, only opportunities to make it yours. Ditch the “shoulds,” keep what matters, and get creative with moments that actually reflect your relationship.

Conclusion

There you have it, five common wedding ceremony pitfalls and exactly how to avoid them.

You only get one chance to say “I do” in front of your people. So don’t let your ceremony be the part you glaze over or leave until last. It doesn’t have to be stiff, awkward, or forgettable. With the right celebrant and a bit of intention, it can be the most powerful, memorable and fun part of your entire day.

Want to make sure yours hits all the right notes?

Let's chat and have some fun!

The Biggest Wedding Ceremony Mistakes (and How to Avoid Them)!